Last week I did a gallery of the concept gadgets I wished were real and available to get my geeky mitts on. This week, my weekly commentary on the tech world is all about gadgets that quite frankly are never gonna happen, but doesn’t stop me badly coveting them as much as a malnutritioned wilder beast craves its next food fix.
Given that flying buggies could be selling in car show rooms as soon as 2010, gives me a glimmer of hope that someone somewhere is working on at least one of the gadgets in my list below. They may be a bit far-fetched but hey, a girl can dream can’t she?
Check out my list after the jump…
An instant make up kit:: Remember the scene in The Fifth Element when Leeloo puts on makeup in about five seconds with a Chanel instant makeup kit? I’d probably bother putting some on in the morning if I had one of these beauties. My ideal version would involve simply resting your face on a ledge facing the device, choosing you’re look and getting your makeup applied in the space of around ten seconds. It’d save me the hassle and perhaps I wouldn’t look like washed out Zombie in the mornings. And the best thing about it is it’d have a realist motherboard, so it would only apply you with makeup that suits you – an error many *many* women make on a day to day basis.
A Magic Mirror: Mirror mirror on the wall have I made the right choice, do I look good today at all? That’s what I’d love to direct at my fabulous personal digital stylist (preferably someone/something fabulous) who lives in my mirror and is programmed to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth. There are many many fashion victims (even me on occasion) who could benefit greatly from such a device telling them the gods honest truth about the way they look before venturing outside. You may think glossy leggings with the long jumper and pumps looked good – the mirror might have told you otherwise. The amount of fashion faux pas and the over use of mid-waisted belts indicates Magic mirrors are very much needed.
A Time Manipulator: I can’t remember the kids programme I first saw this on back in my youth, but I remember the gadget well – a timepiece with the ability to pause, rewind and fast forward time (a similar gadget to the one in Click). I imagine there’d have to be some kind of test people take, or contract people would have to sign threatening serious consequences if broken before getting one. It goes without saying not everyone could be trusted with a device like this.
A transparent Personal Protective Shield: I’m more used to seeing this kind of thing in sci-fi movies, but with the knife crime epidemic and a ridiculously high amount of boys (and girls) wanting to fulfil their gangster fantasies I’d feel a lot safer knowing I was untouchable. Forget bullet/stab proof vests, I want all over protection.
A Time machine: I’d be as eager to have a play with one of these as much as Leonard and his geeky pals in The Big Bang Theory would (did you see that episode?). I don’t need to tell you how cool having your very own time machine would be do I?
Transporter: Now you’d have to be very careful with a contraption like this or you’d meet the ugly side of bodily disfigurement or metamorphosis like Bart Simpson and Jeff Goldblum in The Fly. Treated the right way you could do *a lot* with this thing. My ultimate idea would be to ship one to another country, let’s say Fiji, somehow get it on a private beach and transport myself there when ever I needed to get away from it all.
Inspector Gadget’s Copter hat: How many times did you watch Inspector Gadget and wished you could have at least one of his innovative gadgets to show off to your mates? The copter gadget is still a firm favourite of mine. I’d be saying “Go go gadget copter” all day – on my way to work, popping to the local shop to buy some milk or perhaps even up the stairs when I couldn’t be bothered to use my own muscles.
Want a glimpse of the future and gadgets? Check out our 1000th Shiny video here.
Lucy is the Editorial Assistant for Shiny Shiny and is praying to the god of tech to bring her some of the above as she would lover her very own time machine to go back in time and mess around with the tapestry of history.