Americans are getting (sort of) excited because US McDonalds have just introduced wifi to their restaurants. This made me realise that UK McDonalds have had wifi for years. I hadn’t noticed till now, but I imagine using your laptop in McDonalds doesn’t work very well. Apart from the fact that the salt, sugar and burgers just send your brain into a weird quiet place, the finger grease would just make your touchpad unusuable.
There are many hazards in taking your laptop out to a cafe with wifi, whether it serves burgers or not. Here are 5 things you don’t want to hear:
1. “Yeah we’ve got wifi. But I don’t think it works, no. Dunno.”
2. “Sorry my son just dropped his McFlurry on your keyboard”
3. “Scuse me, can I borrow your laptop to check my bus home/email/uporn account?”
4. “The guy you asked to look after your laptop while you were at the toilet? He just ran out.”
5. “I think that chip is permanently stuck behind the space bar.”