Shiny Shiny reviews the iPad reviews

Yeah, you read it right. I’ve seen more iPad reviews over the past couple of weeks than I’ve had hot meals. Some good, some great, some pretty loathsomely awful.

So I thought I’d round-up the reviews and give each review a review. Why? Becuase who said you can’t review reviews. Someone probably has. But not to me.

Bloomberg Review

You’ve got to love Rich Jaroslovsky. Not only is he one of the most consistently badly dressed, yet somehow cool, tech writers in the world, he gets away with saying hilarious things constantly. Asked about his first impressions, Rich says “I found this device to be very…” what Rich? Intuative? Responsive? “Cool”. Ah yes, “cool”. This man is a genius, the review though is pretty bobbins. The presenter wants to talk about Apple’s PR machine and not the product.
Watch for: Jaroslovsky’s sartorial misdemeanors.

Cnet Review

At just 1.35 minutes, this is one of the shorter reviews, though if you see the end of the video you’ll have done better than we did. The intonation of this girl’s voice makes us want to pull our ears off. And she keeps calling it the iPad tablet for some reason.
Watch for: The weird computer purgatory she seems to be recording in.

Mark Pilip Review

We like Mark, he looks like the kind of person who works in an Apple store and applies to do all the demonstration videos but always gets-pipped-at-the-post by the better looking bloke with cooler glasses. So he goes home and makes his own reviews.
What for: He wishes you a happy Easter, which is nice.

Consumer Reports Review

Well, one thing becomes apparent mere seconds into this review — the Consumer Reports office is a highly pumped, testosterone fueled environment. If you can rip your eyes away from Evon Beckford and actually listen this a pretty tight review. Shiny Shiny salutes you Consumer Reports.
Watch for: Three of the most charismatic tech journalists ever assembled and their one note theme music.

Chris Pirillo’s hour long Review

This suprisingly watchable hour long behemoth of a review is pretty comprehensive. Chris let his viewers join him through every step on launch day, from the delivery man showing up, through to the unboxing and this mamoth 1 hours Q&A. I like Chris, his optimism around new products is always refreshing, well worth a watch.
What for: All the iPad you could ever stomach.

PC Mag’s Review

A workman-like review, it addresses all the main points in lightening quick time. But Christ in a unitard, it’s dull. If you’re ever having trouble sleeping Tim Giddeon’s listing drawl should put you right to sleep. Great if you can stay awake.
Watch for: Boring boring accuracy.

IGN’s Review

Pretty good. Except the reviewer uses the word “acclamation” — which is some horrendous American bastardisation of acclimatize.” We forgive IGN though because they were the first to show Command and Conquer in action.
Watch for: Acclamation. It makes my blood boil.

So there you have it — six reviews reviewed. If you want anymore iPad reviews, you need a doctor.

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