I hate Guitar Hero. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m seriously rubbish at it, or that my boyfriend rocks out like Metallica pre 1990, leaving me sulking and bored on the sofa. Though this game is just a concept at the moment I can imagine it could do really well commercially. Forget all those self help guides and ‘Joy of Sex’ manuals with scary bearded illustrations, here’s a guide to women that the modern man can really utilise. Using an anatomically correct XBOX controller the player is expected to bring the on screen woman to the magic O with deft finger movements.
The creators/ bored stoners/ Apprentice stars in the making have described it like so:
‘The stages in Vagina Hero are women, much like the individual songs in previous Hero games released by a completely different publisher that is in no way related to Activision. There is no background or story explaining how you suddenly find yourself with a naked vagina in your face — the stage loads up and it’s just there. You find your screen assaulted with coloured button-press indicators called “E-Zones”. The E-Zones (or “EZ’s”) correspond to the same coloured buttons on your Vagina Hero controller’.
Unsurprisingly Activision have decline to comment on this concept, but hey, I think they could be missing out on a good thing here. A step by step guide to erogenous zone is no bad thing, and imagine what
mental breakdown fun you could have if this was released on the Wii. Hang on, let’s not go there…
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